GREAT NEWS! The US Air Force Claims It Can Defeat Godzilla

I am so relieved to hear this. I was worried. I've seen all the movies! - Alan

Speaking to the Smithsonian's Air and Space Magazine, the crew from the Kadena Air Base in Japan, home to the largest airwing in the US Air Force, outlined how they would hope to defeat the beast, in anticipation of the movie remake's release in mid-May.

According to one Senior Airman: 'I think Godzilla would be expecting an aerial attack, so to catch him off guard, I think we could need 4,000 Segways and slingshots.'

Asked if there was anyone they would personally feel would add to the defense against Godzilla, he offered up some unusual choices.

'Well I could go with Chuck Norris, but that would be the obvious one.

'As I understand it, the Power Rangers are probably a good choice in this type of scenario..

'Bruce Lee, The Incredible Hulk - the CGI one, not the Lou Ferrigno one - and George W. Bush.'

With a complement of more than 50 F-15 fighter jets available at Kadena, he was asked how many personnel and aircraft would be needed to thwart the threat.

'All of the F-15s we have here, along with four fully loaded Cobra helicopters, complete with eight .50-caliber guns and 600 rounds of multi-purpose ammunition for each,' said Hermann.

'At the very least,.... It’s gotta do something.'

When asked whether Godzilla's special abilities would impact the fight, the crew said atomic breath 'would be the worst,' and that the Air Force wouldn’t go anywhere near his super strength.

And if he can breathe underwater?

'If he goes underwater, the Navy can deal with him.'