Dear Mr. Coffee, every morning your coffee maker brings joy and happiness to the coffee drinkers at Townsquare Media Rochester. A good, reliable brew drips forth, energizing our day. But there's a problem.

It's your carafe. it sucks. Big Donkey Butt. Why? Because it drips. No matter how we pour, it drips. Slow pour? Drip. Fast pour? Drip. Left the lid a little, drip. Put the lid in a car and send it to Kansas? Drip.

This carafe succeeds at being a receptacle but fails as a tool of transfer. That's easily 50% of the job for which it is created. Hold the coffee. Let the coffee flow forth. That's it. I'm going to go ahead and say the engineering of the "hold the coffee" part is pretty easy.

"Hey, Annie, you got that receptacle part figure out?"

"Sure do, boss. Finished it last year."

It's the pouring that's the problem, right? So, please, for the love of all that's holy, and for floors in houses and offices everywhere, go back to the drawing board and solve this problem.

Do it for the children.

Listen to James Rabe 6a to 9a on Y-105 FM